jurmi_bear

Missed Chances

2009-07-26T11:10:39Z

I knew it. I should have been faster. Because of my slow pace, a bright possibility has been replaced by a bleak future.

A missed chance has closed down the doors of opportunity.

I honestly believed you could be my longshot, but now it seems you're just my impossible.

How could things progress now, given the circumstances?

Tomorrow will not be a very good day, knowing that your presence will forever depart the place where your perfect smiles made my heart as light as a cloud.

I'll definitely miss you.

Picking Up The Pieces

2009-07-21T12:03:04Z

Just five years ago, I was at the top of my game. I had no problems with identity, and all these things young adults like me are plagued with.

I just have one realization right now: I regret every moment that I slacked off before. What a waste. Now I'm 20 years old and not getting any younger. I need a change.

Whatever it takes to get better, man. Whatever it takes.

Nameless

2009-06-23T18:13:10Z

You are a Ghost

You are a Memory

Cherish or Forget

It doesn't MATTER

You happened

A force that brought out both the best and worst

A presence that revived and killed me

A person that delivered me to fantasy then back to reality

It doesn't MATTER

You are a Ghost

You are a Memory

Perspective Change

2009-05-22T16:25:17Z

I've missed you, LJ. But not enough, apparently. I haven't even written another entry after I promised to write all those interesting topics. Haha.

The thing is, right now, although I'm FAB (Fat Alone Broke - HAHA), I seem to be at peace. No sarcasm intended, everyone. With all the stuff going on (or the lack of to be more precise), I feel at ease, and I've been able to think more. I'm not saying the path that I should follow has finally been cleared. I'm still a lost, lost animal. But somehow, I feel better. And better is good. :)

I've recently realized how emotional I was before. I am sorry to have spent so much time whining rather than coping. To tell you the truth, things aren't excellent right now. However, I think happiness has suddenly stopped being elusive to me.

LIVE THE DREAM. I should always keep that in mind. And I suppose you should too. :)

Signing In

2009-04-11T16:45:17Z

Yes. Jurmane has been out for a while now.

You see, a lot of things have happened while I was away. And when a lot of things happen... Well, let's just say sometimes it's hard to write all of them down, or which one of them to write. So I've decided to write about stuff I have realized for quite some time now, but haven't written down yet. They're mostly about love and friendship, and dealing with other people.

Here's the list I am hoping to accomplish:

Haley and Lucas - So okay, I'm gonna use Haley and Lucas' relationship in One Tree Hill to illustrate a point about a guy and girl being really friends, and what comes with it.

Spectrum of Difficulty - At how sometimes, we are drawn towards the hard path. Because of valid reasons, of course.

Liking without Boundaries - Ah yes, this topic. Very interesting. :P

Rejection Letter - How a rejection e-mail from a company you're applying to can be likened to a rejection from a girl you really like. Yes, there is a similar pattern!

The Wall - When faced with a wall, you have several options. Some will doom you, some will leave you stagnant, but some will... maybe make you succeed.

Friendship Needs - There are three essential things that lead to friendship. And each one comes after the other.

The Truth about Being Emo - This is to give my thoughts on being emo... How it's not really such a bad thing as other people portray it to be. Yes, I will defend it once and for all. Haha.

So that's about it for now. I hope I get to develop these ideas soon. I'm excited to get to writing again! No matter how shallow my entries are sometimes. Haha.

My friends always say that happiness is more of a choice than a feeling. However, it doesn't matter right now. I feel happy. And I choose to be happy. So I am happy. At pwede ba, huwag na umangal. Kaya ko naman maging masaya. Hahaha. :)

See you friends around. :)

Bakit Ba Ako Pinakapipili?

2009-02-14T16:25:09Z

I don't know what to do about this anymore. I care so much that I can't decide.

Usually its the mind vs the heart.

Now it's just the heart vs. itself.

Rejection

2009-01-27T17:39:43Z

Dearest,

Just wanted to share what I got through e-mail tonight. It's from Unilever.

"Dear MT2009 Applicant,

Thank you for your interest in applying for the Management Trainee Assessment Center (MTAC). Your outstanding academic and leadership performance is impressive and we would like to commend you for your achievements. However, a careful assessment shows that your profile does not match what we are looking for now. Hence, we were unable to advance you to MTAC 2009."

I am understanding slowly why you don't want to work. *sigh*

I hope you're doing better. :)

Being There For Someone You Love

2009-01-24T17:39:47Z

Dearest,

This might seem weird, but I've decided to just use this blog to talk to you since I can't seem to figure out how to through any other way. Somehow, at a distance, I can feel you listening anyway, so I'm happy to write whatever thoughts or stories I wanna share with you here.

Well... Today, I want to talk to you about a dear friend of mine. And I know she's a dear friend of yours too. I really miss her. And I don't know if I have been a bad friend for not realizing it before as much as I do now.

She's going through a very tough time, and I think it's beyond my control to make it better. It's beyond anybody's control. Please help me pray to God for her fast recovery.

I know you'll do your best to take care of her, so thank you. :)

A Moment of Clarity

2009-01-24T15:56:25Z

January 20, 2009

Charles was floating. He didn't know how, and he didn't know why. All he knew was that the city shined below him, populated by the gigantic buildings and cars passing by during rush hour. Around him was the black sky, seemingly saying that stars do not exist at all. He could feel the cool air whipping at his face, his clothes struggling against the force of the wind.

Most people would be terrified to be Charles right now. Oh, but Charles was definitely not like most people. Somehow, he always imagined this situation... Being high above, being left alone by the indifferent world. He smiled as realized how free he was. For the first time, he did not need to worry about his unreasonable boss breathing down his neck for a job done wrong (which has happened so many times already), or his landlord banging on his apartment door to ask for rent six months late. At this precise moment, he was happy.

However, the happiness that flowed through him suddenly stopped. He looked around him. Panic. He was descending the city, faster and faster with every second that passed. Charles screamed and flailed his arms, desperately trying to grasp on to things which aren't really there. It was only at that moment when he realized that all this time, he wasn't floating.

He was falling.

Down and down he went, with his efforts to stop gravity obviously not doing anything. And then, there was silence... Except for one thing. He couldn't hear anything anymore, anything except the loud beating of his heart. It was like his body had already accepted the inevitable. Just a few seconds now, and the man whom only a handful of people know as Charles would be a simple thud on the ground. Just another failure.

His eyes watered, realizing this was the end. He felt sorry for himself.

...

Charles' eyes adjusted to the light that was coming from the fuzzy television in his living room. Apparently, he fell asleep on the couch again, with pizza leftovers and soda cups decorating his immediate surroundings. He got up and walked towards the refrigerator, eager to get himself a glass of water. As he drank, as the cold liquid gushed down his throat, he realized that life made some sense after all.

Everything made sense.

So What Am I Thinking About This Finals Week?

2008-10-03T18:02:33Z

Elizabeth Banks is so so so beautiful. And a good actress to boot.

She's actually making me watch Meet Dave. MEET DAVE (forgetting that I am a movie buff who watches GOOD movies). HAHA. I think I've never had this much crush on a celebrity before. That's right. I'll write more about it next time. Hahaha. :)

Shet, what a weird entry.

Fleeting

2008-09-26T17:35:13Z

I try to bring it back, but the magic seems to be lost forever.

I long for the sweet conversations we had last February.

How they seem so long ago.

And fleeting.

I miss them.

Song Realization

2008-09-20T09:52:34Z

We can find God everywhere.

We can even find it in "Everywhere" by Michelle Branch, popularly covered by Yellowcard:

"Cause You're everywhere to me, and when I close my eyes it's You I see. You're everything I know that makes me believe... I'm not alone."

We can find God everywhere. :) *bow* HAHAHA

The Value of Time

2008-09-08T12:56:07Z

It's funny how 5 minutes can seem like an eternity.

It's even funnier how 5 minutes can make you the happiest you've ever been for a long time.

If you look at it the second time around, it's not really funny, actually.

Those minutes are what you call blessings. :)

Game On

2008-09-01T21:18:24Z

Effecting Much-Needed Change...

NOW.

I feel that today is going to be great :D

2008-08-31T18:40:22Z

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAIA! :)

VIVA LA VIDA! :)

On Cramming

2008-08-20T18:50:03Z

Academic cramming is not advisable. Not advisable at all.

But why do people still do it? Why do I do it? (I'm cramming something right now, obviously.)

Well...

Aside from total laziness, we cram because we want to make time for other things that matter in life. You delay study to talk to people, go to places, do some weird shit. Whatever. :)

We are students, and we are people. This is true. But we should always remember that we will always be more of the latter than the former.

Viva La Vida, like the song says. Just don't overdo cramming. It wouldn't be cramming anymore.

It would be stupidity.

Time is of the essence.

2008-07-22T18:43:34Z

Mastering the art of not sleeping is not easy. Trust me, I've tried and failed repeatedly.

I need more hours in a day. Haha. :)

A Bullet to the Head Does The Trick

2008-07-05T17:14:50Z

Watching Wanted (James McAvoy, Angelina Jolie, Morgan Freeman) has made me realize two things:

1) That I am finally convinced that Angelina Jolie is smoking and definitely has appeal, something that I wasn't really seeing before. Impossible but true. :)

AND

2) That I need a life-changing experience. QUICK.

I will post a full blog about the movie when I have the time. :) And man, I have to read Mark Millar's Wanted graphic novel soon. Without the man who also wrote Marvel Comics Civil War (arguably the best comic book idea of the decade), this high-flying movie would not have been possible. Comic book geek heart, let me not forget the urgency of this task! :) Haha. :)

So Talented and Purdeeee

2008-06-06T06:02:12Z

YouTube marathon = Carrie Underwood music videos!

I think I'm falling in love with her again. Hahaha. :)

Effect

2008-03-20T19:11:04Z

On Everything by Lifehouse: I know I've listened to it for a lot of times already, but everytime I get to hear it again, I tend to get emotional.

Or feel like crying.

jurmi_bear @ 2008-02-12T16:30:00

2008-02-12T08:33:37Z

To describe what human beings are, one Protestant Theologian said that human beings are just piles of shit. :)

Nicely said! Wouldn't you agree, Oliver Go? Hahaha. :)

Spider-Man: They got this right!

2007-10-08T22:44:58Z

Your results:
You are Spider-Man

Spider-Man		80%
Green Lantern		75%
Hulk		60%
Catwoman		60%
Superman		55%
The Flash		50%
Iron Man		50%
Supergirl		48%
Robin		45%
Wonder Woman		38%
Batman		30%

You are intelligent, witty,
a bit geeky and have great
power and responsibility.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

Juggernaut, Get out of the way!

2007-10-08T22:41:04Z

Your results:
You are Juggernaut

Juggernaut		57%
Lex Luthor		56%
Kingpin		56%
Venom		55%
The Joker		52%
Magneto		51%
Apocalypse		51%
Dr. Doom		50%
Mystique		49%
Dark Phoenix		49%
Mr. Freeze		46%
Green Goblin		41%
Two-Face		37%
Riddler		36%
Catwoman		29%
Poison Ivy		20%

Your strength and determination are difficult to stop.

Click here to take the "Which Super Villain am I?" quiz...

Just 10 days.

2007-09-08T22:00:24Z

For the first time here, I felt homesick. It's not about my Audencia mates, they're really nice. It's just that I miss the people whom I can easily talk to. Mga taong pwede ko sabihan ng kung anu-anong bagay lang.

Shet, hindi talaga ako sanay na walang kasama sa kuwarto. Burgoo, you are deeply missed. Hope everything's allright there.

Sleep Party

2007-09-05T16:47:44Z

I'm gonna go to a party in a while. But I still want to sleep. Bummer.

PS: Maia, I'm gonna start posting pictures in Multiply real soon. Haha. Oh and here, real entries as well. :)